I am not sure where it came from, or when it started, but for the past several years I have had a passion for salsa dancing. Passion is a strong word, I suppose, but let's just say I really enjoy salsa dancing. I went for the first time with my sister and a group of her friends years ago, and had a blast! Sure it is a bit intimidating and you have to be quick on your feet, a quick learner and willing to trip over yourself, your partner, and willing to laugh at yourself a bit. But besides that, it's super great.
Overall, I LOVE dancing. I was always a huge fan of the middle school sock hops, high school dances, prom, homecoming, you name it- I was there. Wedding dances are my favorite! If there is an empty floor and a good DJ, you can always count on this girl to be one of the first ones on the floor. With that said, when I had my first experience with salsa dancing- I fell in love. I love the more organized aspect of it. The idea of having specific steps and dancing because it is a passion is something that I admire in the salsa communities. Now I understand that there are elements "dirty dancing" at a salsa club, but I appreciate that it's not the nasty 'grinding up on each other' sort of dancing. (Which really, is that even dancing?) With salsa it's more about the dance, the culture of it all... I feel like I'm starting to sound like I'm straight out of Footloose defending dancing or something.
And now, I've gotten quite far away from where I originally meant to go with this post. I'll try to focus and pull it together. Because of this curiosity or intrigue with salsa dancing- I decided to try taking a Salsa dance class. Tonight was the night. I asked a friend to come with me and she was a great sport not having danced salsa before. I've been salsa dancing a few times before, so I caught on pretty quickly. Overall it was a BLAST!! There were about 12 of us there, a pretty good balance of men and women and we all took turns with different partners learning some advanced beginner steps, and then on to an intermediate dance. All in all, it was a great experience. I would definitely go back and do it again.
But then... there was a little part of the evening that tainted my experience. Long story short without explaining everything, one of the men that I danced with later proceeded to ask if I wanted his number. Ugh. Here is where the title of this post should start to make sense. What I don't get is, Does a wedding ring mean NOTHING? You danced with me, you held my hand (because you have to in salsa dancing), I was talking with my hands as I explained I wasn't going to be at the next salsa event tomorrow and yet somehow either you are blind and missed the rock and band on my finger, OR, you are just choosing to ignore it. No- I don't want your number! I'm wearing a ring that means I am MARRIED- off the market! And I know you're not just trying to be my friend.
It both frustrates me and makes me feel sad. Sure, there is an element of every girl, whether you admit it or not, that loves to be admired or wanted. I'd be lying if I said it doesn't feel nice to know that someone has interest. But does that mean that it is okay for you to be hitting on me when clearly I am wearing a ring on my left hand which has the role of being a physical reminder of the promise that I made to a man who is my HUSBAND? No- in my book that's not okay.
The reason it makes me sad is because it makes me wonder what this world is really coming to. Has our world really become SO corrupted that marriage means nothing? Therefore the physical reminder of the wedding ring on the finger also doesn't give the signal to not hit on me? Sad.
To me, my wedding ring stands for the choice I have made to be in a loving relationship with one man for the rest of my life. That doesn't mean that if you see me without him by my side, then I'm fair game. It means, if you want to admire me, tell me that I'm hot or whatever the heck you want- then fine- go for it (like I said, I'm a girl, we all like it)! Go ahead and tell me my husband is a lucky man, or something! I won't get mad at you for that. But then cut it off there, don't hit on me. Then I can walk away having respect for you because you respected the fact that I'm a married woman.
Point is- if you're single and you see that someone is wearing a wedding ring, or engagement ring, BE RESPECTFUL! Have the common courtesy to stick to the friend zone, just chat, whatever!! Don't be the fool who hits on a married woman.
Marriage should mean something these days. It does to me.
